Or any other day for that matter...
- Nori had a diarrhea explosion in her kennel
- Clark threw up right outside the front door
- Nori threw up on the family room carpet
- I tried to clean up Nori's vomit, but I didn't get all of it and now it's all over the inside of the vacuum. It was an accident.
- The microwave is broken.
- Nori is really sick. She's coughing and her nose is really runny.
- (sound of dog heaving again)
- I'm at the school carnival and I need money now.
- (sound of approximately one gallon of dog vomit hitting the floor. The carpet. Of course. Because the FUCKING TILE floor was only eighteen inches away.)
- Vet's office. "We're totally booked tonight. We have one opening at 8:30 AM tomorrow.
- (peek outside the door, dog is having another diarrhea explosion in the front yard)
Remind me. WHY do I have two dogs? Because I enjoy a constant assault on my nostrils?